Monday, December 28, 2009
Completely, Wonderfully Preoccupied
Saturday, December 5, 2009
The moment we'd all been waiting for...
Monday, November 16, 2009
Family/Surrogacy Pictures
Monday, November 2, 2009
Halloween '09
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Still Here...
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Abram's 3D
As for inducing lactation, it's going well. I'm making about an ounce a day now. It may not seem like much, but to me, it's incredible! I've got 8 weeks to build up my supply and so far, I'm impressed with my body.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Busy With Great Things
Thursday, September 17, 2009
An Open Letter to Abram
Friday, September 4, 2009
Doing Much Better...
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Rolling Along...
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
Time to Celebrate
Ten years ago this Thursday, Brandon and I walked into a church and entered into a covenant- between God, myself, and him. We met September 4, 1998 at a Sulphur High football game. I had graduated from high school the May prior and he had recently moved to Sulphur to start his career as a Chemical Engineer. He was invited by a man at work to the game and I had gone with a friend. Brandon happened to be sitting with a guy I graduated with and we sat near them to visit. I instantly was smitten :) Him, notsomuch. I decided not to let him get away. I pursued him until he gave in. By mid-June, we realized we were going to be together forever, so why wait!? We married six weeks later and haven't looked back. That wonderful day, we were surrounded by our closest friends and family and promised to love one another forever. We decided to write our own vows. Brandon, ever the musician, sat at a grand piano in the front of the church and sang his to me. The line that stuck out was when he promised to give his life for me as Christ gave His life for the Church. Then, I stood in front of him, index card in hand, and read my vows to him. I found them the other day in a box of pictures...tear stained and all. Here is what it said...
Brandon-From the first day we met at that Friday night football game, I felt in my heart that this day would come. You were the one who needed convincing. I had prayed for that special someone from the time I knew what that meant. Something happened to me when I saw you. I knew that I would regret it for the rest of my life if I let you get away. I know everyone laughs when I say God was steering my car that Monday when I went by your house, but I truly believe that. Now, I stand before some of the most important people in our lives and promise to love until the God who unites us, separates us. This is the most important promise I have ever made and I will keep it. Through the good and the bad, there is not a single part of me that doubts that. There is no one I would rather make this covenant with. I pray we will have a marriage other people will respect. There was once a time when the only thing that made me believe that love existed were the songs on the radio. Those days are over, my prayers have been answered, and one day our children will know love exists because of our model. They will look at us and pray that one day they will have a love like their mom and dad. I love you!
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Preparing...
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Ramblings of an emotional, not pregnant woman :)
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Introducing (again!)...
Thursday, July 9, 2009
7-8-09
Missouri 2009
Sunday, June 28, 2009
We're 15 weeks!
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Patiently Waiting (or not so much)
Friday, June 19, 2009
We're Baaaaacccck...
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Time...
Pregnancy Update...
Saturday, May 23, 2009
My Grandpa...
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
We've got a baby with rhythm...
Sunday, May 17, 2009
This Weekend
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Growing...
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
A Special Treat
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Speechless, Astonished, and Amazed...
But, I've never been here before. This surrogacy journey has done things to me, already, that I cannot explain. I am without words. We went in today for our second ultrasound. Standing there looking at that black and white screen, I was overcome. There, in front of my eyes, was the child I have longed for, ached for in the deepest part of my soul for nearly 4 years. Amongst, the grainy, grey sea, a black void and within it, a perfectly tiny body. Within that perfectly tiny body, an itsy bitsy flicker that changed me forever...one perfectly formed, beating heart. I really can't describe what that moment was like, much less put it in comprehensible form for all to read. The thought that when we are but the size of a grain of rice, our heart begins to beat is mind blowing. That before we are fully formed, before any of our other organs function, our heart beats is incredible. I think there is a huge significance to the order in which we develop. The Bible tells us that God knows us even before we are formed in the womb and to think that while we went about our daily lives in the last week, doing our ordinary things, God started a tiny heart beating, well, I'm speechless. All I know to do is cry out to the God that loves me so much and thank Him for healing me from years of longing and breathing life into that tiny miracle.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Yesterday...
Now, I'm going to try to get myself motivated enough to clean this messy house and take a much needed shower. Wish me luck :)
Monday, April 20, 2009
A Complete and Utter Lack of Motivation...
On a MUCH happier note, our ultrasound is tomorrow morning. I am so excited to be able to get a look at what is ahead of us :) Maybe God will provide all I am asking for through this miraculous journey.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Beta #2...
Let me just say that Dawn + our embryos=an incredible team! For those of you who know nothing about beta numbers, that is fantastic! They're well above the curve and we have a doubling time of 36 hours! Dr. G wants her to be tested again tomorrow morning and after we get that number, we'll schedule the ultrasound, but it looks like it will be Monday! I am so stinkin' excited!
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
The 1st Beta is Back...
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
This Week Has Been a Ride...
Dawn and me
Brandon and me, dressed for the occasion :)
Dawn and Roger, dressed to impress!
After transfer, Dawn was on bed rest for three days. I took the opportunity to spend the days with her, hanging out and talking. It was really nice! Saturday, she was released to be upright again. We ventured into Houston to have lunch with some great ladies from the surrogacy community plus, Kelly and Vera. We had a great time and I tried sushi for the first time (don't know if I will again, but I impressed myself with my bravery!). Sunday, our families, plus Kelly and Vera (who are pretty much family, at this point!) had lunch and we decided we could not wait anymore...we had to test. It was way early, but we decided to get our negative out of the way, so we did. Monday, Dawn and two of her children came down with a terrible stomach bug. I was sick, too, but mine had to do with hyperstimulation of my ovaries (I'm on the mend now). Late Monday afternoon, the call came. Dr. G's nurse called and said that neither of our remaining embryos made it to freeze. It was a horrible end to a horrible day. Brandon and I were both heartbroken. It was a total shock and something I could have never prepared myself for. I really had no idea that I would instantly feel the way I do for those four embryos. I had no idea I would need to grieve for the two we lost. I don't know if it's something you can understand unless you've been there. I know I didn't. My mind began running with the "what-ifs" and began to wonder about the two we transferred...whether either of them were okay. Dawn and Roger were so wonderful and through this process have really felt everything along with us: the joy, excitement, frustration, worry, mourning, and all out terror...I'm sure there is a lot more to come, but I am so thankful for both of them! Dawn felt pregnant and said she was sure she was pregnant. She tested Monday night and got a faint positive! We tested three times yesterday: morning, noon, and night...all positive and getting darker! Dawn is definitely pregnant!!! In a matter of hours, God took our mourning and gave us hope! I am in complete awe of Him and the way He works all things to the good. Dawn will have her blood work done on Wednesday, the 15th and we'll find out about an ultrasound then. I cannot wait to see our baby (or babies!) and know that all is well!
Monday, March 30, 2009
This Post Brought to You by the Number: 4...
Sunday, March 29, 2009
A Momentous Day...
One thing interesting...Dr. Gill came in before they took me back and explained to me why he decided to do it today. The nurse had said, Friday afternoon, that my progesterone had taken a big jump and he didn't want me to ovulate. Well, Dr. Gill said that the reason my progesterone took that jump was because one or two of my follicles had already ovulated! The ovulated follicles release the progesterone and tell your uterus (if you have one :) that it's time to head into another phase of the process. He was concerned that the rest of the follicles would ovulate, so they triggered me immediately. He also said that if we had been putting the embryos back in me, we would have had to cancel the entire cycle because of the change to the uterus from this happening! I am so glad that the nurse left all that out on Friday. I would have been nervous about ovulating all weekend!
So, thanks everyone for the well wishes! I'm good and so relieved that part is done! We'll know tomorrow how many fertilized and whether we are transferring on Tuesday or Thursday. I'll update then!
Friday, March 27, 2009
It's Time...
An exciting weekend ahead...
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Appointment #2 This Week...
Oh, and the picture above is my feet wearing the socks I wore today. Yep ladies, I wore these to the "female doctor" today. You know the nurse loved that!